"In every moment the universe is whispering to you. There are messages for you carried on the winds. There is wisdom for you in the morning songs of the birds outside your window and in the soft murmurs of an ebbing sea. Even ordinary, everyday events in your life carry communications from the realm of spirit."
— Denise Linn, The Secret Language of Signs
Some times when you are making art it feels like a little magic is sprinkled here and there. But with this print I felt like the universe went to extraordinary lengths and poured copious magic throughout the whole process. It started with a couple of delightful synchronicities and then packed a wallop of wonder at the end that left me to marvel at the beauty of it all.
Inspiration
I always start a blog post by describing my inspiration. This time, I am saving that story for the end because it is quite a doozy! If you can't wait, then skip down to Part II.
PART I - THE PROCESS
Sketch & Transfer
I began my sketch by finding a photo I took of maple helicopters and then sized it appropriately in Photoshop. I then printed it out and traced the outline onto sketch paper. I looked at a thousand images of the Buddha for reference and then drew the face, hand and "robes" into the outline of the helicopter. Once I liked that image, I flipped it over and traced it onto another piece of paper.
I wanted the left and right sides to be similar, but not exactly the same. I mainly changed the folds in the "robes" to be a little different.
Once I had both left and right sides drawn, I flipped both over and rubbed the backside to transfer the images to the Safety-kut plate.
Carving
I wanted the left and right sides to be similar, but not exactly the same. I mainly changed the folds in the "robes" to be a little different.
Once I had both left and right sides drawn, I flipped both over and rubbed the backside to transfer the images to the Safety-kut plate.
Carving
I then carved the plates using Flexcut v-gouge chisels.
I was carving during December and it was so cold in my studio, I moved into the center storage room in our basement. Otus thought it was weird, but kept me good company.
Test Print
Once the plate was carved I did a test print with a stamp pad. It is a quick and easy way to get a preview of the print.
This video shows me using the stamp pad to ink the plate and pull a quick print. Turn your volume on!
Synchronicity
The night before I pulled the test print I was in the TV room and saw the cats on the couch together sleeping. They had a terrible fight last year and had to be kept apart for six months. So when I saw them sleeping so close, I took a photo.
The next day I pulled the test print and took lots of pictures of the process. That evening I went upstairs, and right next to each other in my photo feed was this!
I could hardly believe the coincidence...two orange Buddhas in each photo! And their body positions were so similar! It felt like a wink from the universe.
"Every time I have become aware of a synchronicity experience,
I have had an accompanying feeling that some grace came along with it."
I have had an accompanying feeling that some grace came along with it."
— Jean Shinoda Bolen in Coincidence or Destiny by Phil Cousineau
Printing
After printing the test print I made some minor adjustments to the plate. I widened the eye and hand lines a bit. Sometimes the lines can close up when using the real ink, and it is better to take care of it before printing.
This video shows me inking the plate with Charbonnel gold etching ink and printing on three different kinds of paper.
I really liked the way the tissue paper printed. The wrinkles in the paper gave the effect of aged Buddhas. I printed the dark brown background on the tissue paper before-hand in my chin collé class at Tiger Lily Press.
I bought the papyrus paper shown below at Plaza Art store. The paper was very thick and I really liked the texture.
I didn't think there was enough contrast between the print and the papyrus paper so I watercolored the paper with dark brown. I still haven't done anything yet with the papyrus Buddhas, but I think they will embroider nicely.
Of all three papers, the "Mesquite" banana paper was the most smooth. So I thought it would be wise to try the embroidery with it first.
Below you can see the banana paper cut out and photographed. These were some of my favorite photos of the whole process.
"Life itself is alive...and wise beyond our comprehension."
—Vanessa Sorensen
Finished Print
Making Holes
Once I had my cut-out Buddha seeds I was ready to figure out the embroidery holes. I scanned the Buddha seeds into the computer and figured out where every hole should be using Illustrator. Here you can see the Illustrator file before I printed it onto a transparency.
Once I had the transparency ready, I taped the seeds down exactly where I wanted them on my paper. I then lined the transparency up perfectly and taped it down.
Once everything was lined up and taped down, I hammered the holes with an awl. This photo shows the holes nicely.
Sewing
Once all the holes were punched, it was time to sew!
I finally had to buy readers for all this embroidery work. They took a little getting used to, but helped a ton.
Below you can see the embroidery on the robes was almost done.
Beadwork
I was so excited to find these gold Heishi beads.
I bought three sizes of beads so it took me a little bit of play to figure out how I would place them. I really liked the below photo of the beads. It appeared to me like magic rising off the Buddha's head.
I wasn't sure how I was going to attach the Heishi beads and did a couple tests. I experimented using both gold seed beads and knots to hold them on. In the end I chose the seed beads.
I bought so many beads for this project that I had to buy a bead organizer!
Synchronicity
“Synchronicity is an inexplicable and profoundly meaningful coincidence that stirs the soul and offers a glimpse of one’s destiny.”
– Phil Cousineau
– Phil Cousineau
In September 2022 I started a six month "Deeper Callings" course with Marilyn Hardy. The course was about "living a rich embodied life with a soul-infused purpose." The course met two times per month and I was in the middle of the course when I began making the Buddha seeds.
We had assigned reading and/or videos. One night when I was sewing the Heishi beads onto the Buddhas, I was listening to a video of Jonathan Gustin interviewing Adyashanti. I had just run out of embroidery floss and had to cut a new piece to thread the needle, when I heard Jonathan say:
"Once we find this golden thread of destiny and we're holding onto it, we never feel lost.
Wherever we go, we know what it is we are there to do."
Wherever we go, we know what it is we are there to do."
I was literally holding onto a golden thread right at that moment! It gave me the chills and again I felt like the universe was winking at me.
I absolutely loved the course I took with Marilyn. I think taking a course like that helps one orient to the process of self-discovery. I certainly didn't expect to find my life purpose in a six month course. But I did have the realization that, "There is no one better suited to this job than me" ("this job" meaning my current botanical print/embroidery work).
Video
This video includes scanning the print, figuring out the holes using Illustrator, hammering the holes, and sewing the robes and beads.
Finished Print
Below is the final print!
Once I finished the print I photographed it in several different locations and the lighting differences made quite a difference. When I took photos upstairs by the window, the beads appeared to glow.
And when I took photos outside the beads were more muted and the threads were emphasized more.
Above is outside and below is inside.
The photo below is one of my favorites.
Framed Print
I framed the Buddha seeds before the other embroidered prints and made all the color choices (frame and mat) based on them. I liked how the seeds stood out against the lighter frame.
Show
Below is a photo of the print next to its label at my first solo show "Faith In A Seed" at the Weavers Guild.
PART II
Inspiration
In December 2022 I took a class on chin collé at Tiger Lily Press and needed a subject. I had previously made work with the maple helicopter as the subject and knew I had more ideas for them than I had time to make. So one day I gathered all my photos of them and, sure enough, there was a motherload of inspiration. I had also agreed to do the show for the Weaver’s Guild and was hoping to have a subject on which I could both chin collé and embroider.
The over-arching idea I wanted to convey was the “miraculousness” of this seed pod. This elegant structure allows a tiny embryo of a tree to be safely carried to the ground using a single wing that spins on its way to the earth. With a little wind, the shape of the wing helps the seed to travel far enough away from the mother tree to find a good place to sprout. I recently met a NASA engineer who studied the aerodynamics of this structure to understand how it works.
For most of my life I have not been particularly interested in religion. If you had asked me what my religion was, I would have quoted the Dalai Lama and said my religion was kindness, with a particular reverence for nature. Nowadays I am still not overly interested in formal religion, but I am open to all forms of the divine, however they might present themselves. And lately I am sensing that there is a deep mystery hidden most everywhere... from maple helicopter to milkweed seeds. One might call it divine, God, or Buddha-nature. Whatever the case, I wanted to express this exquisite nature in my piece.
“The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.”
― Oscar Wilde
So I started thinking about how to portray the extraordinary nature of this seed pod. My first thought was to make slightly larger-than-life "helicopters" (seen to the left) and put the Virgin of Guadalupe into the seed head portion of it. I even went so far as to purchase tiny beads with the Virgin of Guadalupe on them that I thought I would sew into the printed piece. (I ended up using them for the "Milkweed" print). But after cutting out the helicopter shapes, I thought everything was too small…and I am not one to work small.
I went back to my photos to look for another option. When I saw the photo of just two maple helicopters I realized I could make the seeds larger and have more room for something in the "head" area. I Googled, “symbols of the divine” and when I saw the Buddha I knew he was my subject right away. At first I thought I might be able to fit a tiny Buddha in a lotus position in the top portion. Then it dawned on me that the circles of Buddha’s hair would be wonderful as a large texture, and I decided to put just the Buddha's face in the seed area.
Abhaya
When I started sketching, my intent was to have the Buddha’s head be the “seed” portion of the maple helicopter and the lower portion would be the typical “helicopter” wing. But when I was drawing it, I realized the lines of the wing looked like robes and it occurred to me I could add a hand. And the hand could be in a typical mudra position in which the Buddha is often portrayed. A mudra is a symbolic gesture, mainly of the hands. When I looked at images of the Buddha, I liked the mudra where he is simply holding his hand up. I researched this mudra and discovered the name is “Abhaya.” Apparently, when it is done with the right hand it signifies “fearlessness”. That really resonated with me because lately I have been trying to be more aware of my fears and to see how they affect my life.
When I flipped the image to make the right Buddha, I realized the left hand would be raised. So I looked into what it means if the left hand is raised in “Abhaya” and found that it means “dispelling family arguments.” That also had a strong resonance for me as I have struggled mightily in that area.
After reading all of this I decided I should name the piece “Abhaya.” But as I was carving the piece and looked at both the left and right hand sides, the term “Buddha-Nature” also kept popping into my head. I liked that term for several reasons. First, I thought it would be nice to have a two-word name for the double image. Second, I liked that it is a simple description of combining the Buddha image with nature (the maple helicopter). Third, I liked that it referenced my original idea for the piece…that is, that the divine can be found everywhere…that every single thing has a Buddha-nature.
Tathagatagarbha - Mega Synchronicity
I decided to Google “Buddha Nature” and discovered there is a Sanskrit term for it called “Tathagatagarbha.” And when I saw the translations/descriptions for this word I was floored! Here are a few of my favorites:
1) The Sanskrit tathāgata-garbha more precisely means “having a tathāgata [= buddha] within. (Source)
2) Tathagatagarbha can be translated as “Buddha-Nature,” “Buddha-Womb, “ or “Buddha Embryo.” (Source)
3) “The tathagatagarbha is even regarded at times as a fully formed Buddha sitting cross-legged in the lotus position in each one of us. It is described variously as a seed, embryo, matrix, potentiality for becoming a Buddha… it is the potential in every sentient being to attain Buddhahood (to become a Buddha) because she or he has a tathagatagarbha within them as their essence, core, or essential inner nature. (Source)
I loved the synchronicity that my image contains two embryonic seed Buddhas. And what blew my mind even further was that when I was making the print, I consciously created a womb-shape between the two seeds. I thought it would be a hidden element in the piece that only I knew about. So when I read that "Tathagatagharbha" could be translated as "Buddha-womb," I was utterly amazed. How could this centuries-old term seemed to fit so perfectly?!
When I read further about the term, I learned that nine similes have traditionally been used to help people understand what it means. And one of the similes describes “Tathgatagarbha” as:
"a sprout that has the potential to grow into a huge tree
that will offer shade for many people on a hot day"
— Dalai Lama, 14th, and Thubten Chodron. Saṃsāra, Nirvāṇa, and Buddha Nature (Source)
— Dalai Lama, 14th, and Thubten Chodron. Saṃsāra, Nirvāṇa, and Buddha Nature (Source)
The more I read, the more I was blown away by how closely this term fit my piece.
And three quotes from the Tathagatagarbha Doctrine made this term fit even further.
"The Śrimālā Sutra identifies... 'the tathagatagarbha with the dharmakaya, the Buddha’s celestial body that pervades all things in the universe.'"
"…for Dogen, it is insufficient to say that all sentient beings have the Buddha-nature (or indeed contain a tathagatagarbha). From his perspective, the phrase ‘sentient being’ refers to everything in the universe and everything in the universe is Buddha-nature. All beings, sentient and insentient, literally are Buddha-nature. Dogen says: ‘Grass, trees, and lands are mind; thus they are sentient beings. Because they are sentient beings they are Buddha-nature. Sun, moon, and stars are mind; thus they are sentient beings; thus they are Buddha-nature.”
"For Dogen... Buddha-nature is not an essence ‘hidden’ in things, ...but the vast world of phenomena, of Reality itself.”
Somehow this term even captured my original idea for making this piece, which was to convey the idea that the miraculous, or divine, or God, or Buddha pervades everything everywhere.
For all of the above reasons I named the piece, "Tathagatagarbha." When I think about it, I still can't believe that this Sanskrit word from the late 2nd century describes my piece on every layer of meaning I could imagine. I bow down to the universe for this "MEGA SYNCHRONICITY"!
For all of the above reasons I named the piece, "Tathagatagarbha." When I think about it, I still can't believe that this Sanskrit word from the late 2nd century describes my piece on every layer of meaning I could imagine. I bow down to the universe for this "MEGA SYNCHRONICITY"!
Dream
About a week after I wrote the above section about “tathagatagarbha” I had the following dream:
I dreamt I was pulling the arms/reins of a giant wooden ricksaw cart full of people. And not only that, but I had to pull the rickshaw down an ancient, steep spiral staircase. At first I thought it would be impossible, but then I just pulled on the arms/reins and the rickshaw easily followed right behind me. It didn’t even tip over when going down the stairs. It was so easy that I got too far in front of it and then noticed the reins were slack. I knew the cart was probably stuck some ways back. I couldn’t even see it! I started to climb back up the stairs but the stairs were broken and were vertically almost a bodies-width apart. I had to jump and catch onto the stair above and pull myself up with my arms. On one step I was holding on by my fingers and struggling to pull myself up but was unable. Finally, I had to let go.
In my free fall I noticed an extra thin wire, like a guitar string but smooth, hanging down from somewhere in the darkness. I grabbed onto it, and it swung me around and slowed my fall. I then was able to grab another, and it also swung me around like Tarzan. Eventually I was plunked down to sit perfectly on some type of plant that was saddle-shaped. After realizing my good fortune, I eventually made my way to the bottom of the stairs. As I took the last steps I looked over through lots of hanging wire strings to see a group of young Zen masters playing a game where their movements created the most exquisite music I’ve ever heard (kind of like that beat boxing monk on YouTube I like). Someone approached me and said, “Welcome. Congratulations. You have made it.” I said I was only there by accident. As they were packing up, one of the music monks said, “No, you were meant to be here. We have been waiting for you.” They packed up and left.
Another monk appeared. He walked over to the bottom step and said, “Here is a token of your accomplishment.” He then handed me what I thought was a stone sculpture of a small hand. But when I took it into my hand, it was soft and fleshy. And it was perfectly rounded where the wrist/arm connection would be. It was so cute and soft. I laid it down and it “relaxed” slightly. He handed me another one. And then I woke up.
Wood Carving Synchronicity
During this time period, so many synchronicities were happening that I decided to research the subject. I came across a book called, "Sidewalk Oracles: Playing with Signs, Symbols, and Synchronicity in Everyday Life" by Robert Moss. I greatly enjoyed the book which had numerous suggestions for how to create moments of synchronicity in your life. One of his suggestions for keeping a synchronistic moment "alive" was to keep the image or symbol of the event around you so that you see it everyday.
Then, one day while searching for beads on Etsy I had entered "Carved Wooden Buddha Beads" into the search bar. As I scrolled down, I was amazed to see a wooden carving of a hand with a Buddha carved in it. It was dark brown and reminded me so much of my "Hand" dream described above. I really wanted to buy it but was afraid it would be expensive. When I clicked on it I was happily surprised to see it was $50. I couldn't believe my luck!
For a week or so I pondered if I should buy it. Then I finally purchased it when buying beads for the prints. A couple weeks later a package arrived in the mail. I knew what it was and excitedly cut the box open. When I unwrapped the paper around the carving and finally pulled it out I was happy and sad at the same moment. I loved the carving of the Buddha in the hand. But the color was a very light wood stain...maybe even unstained (but polyurethaned). I really had my heart set on a dark brown hand and that was what the Etsy photo had shown.
I never do this, but I decided to send a message to the owner of the Etsy store. I messaged him and told him I was disappointed with the color and wanted to return it. He wrote back that maybe his photo was a little dark. I had done a quick search about how to change the stain color of wood that was already polyurethaned. I found a suggestion that you could use a gel stain over polyurethane. I told the Etsy owner that I could possibly try that method. He replied that if I really wanted, he could make me a new one and send it to me unstained. I was so happy and told him I would love that!
As I packaged the light-colored hand to send back to him I decided to write the Etsy owner a note. I told him I didn't know if he knew this, but that the hand represented fearlessness. I wrote that I hardly ever ask people to re-do things if I am not happy with them for fear they would reject my request. But that his response to re-make the carving had reinforced in me the idea to be fearless...to let my needs be known. I thanked him and sent the package on its way.
A week or so later I received a message through Etsy from the store owner. He said that my new hand was on its way. He thanked me for my note and said he included a second Buddha hand as a gift. I nearly fell off my chair when I read that! It so mimicked my dream!
I have since stained my new Buddha hand and it is hanging at the bottom of the stairs to remind me to be fearless everyday. I gave the other to a dear friend.
Conclusion
As I look back at everything that happened I am overwhelmed by the mystery of it all. At times I am so awestruck that I can hardly wrap my head around it. I don't know what it means. But I do know that every time one of these synchronicities happened, it gave me great joy.
Lest someone read this and think things are always "super-Polyanna" over here, I do feel the need to mention that the time period when all this was happening was quite a roller coaster ride. Basically from December to April when I was making the new embroidered work for my show, I was barely able to keep my head above water. A lovely coincidence would happen and then I found out my husband had Covid. Another amazing event would happen and then I found out the majority of my prints stored in the basement were ruined by foxing. I could go on and on. It was a really intense time.
Things have slowed down a bit lately in all departments, and I am more than OK with it. But I still like to ponder what it all means. These experiences give me the sense that everything is interconnected. If everything is ONE thing, then why wouldn't ONE conspire to bring about these moments of delight? It would be like leaving bread crumbs on a trail to oneself. Every crumb is pure joy and we are thrilled to have another clue. But then the mystery only deepens. What is all this and where am I heading? Of course, we don't really know. However, I am left with a feeling of reassurance. And I am also left with a strong urge to keep my eyes and ears open. I imagine using every sense I have to find another tidbit. I am ready to run when I catch the scent. I imagine myself a fearless gobbler of morsels ever-hungry for more.
But I suppose a more apt metaphor for this post would be that we are all sprouts transformed by sun, water, earth and moon. Hardships are endured. But with each drop of water and every ray of sun, we grow. We grow through storm, drought, exquisite moonlit nights, and spring rains... the smell of damp earth almost too lovely to bear. All come and go bearing gifts of transformation. Until one day we realize we are no longer a sprout but a great tree providing shade on a hot day. We realize we are the tree, the water, the sun and moon, the shade, the sky and all the spaces in-between.
Lest someone read this and think things are always "super-Polyanna" over here, I do feel the need to mention that the time period when all this was happening was quite a roller coaster ride. Basically from December to April when I was making the new embroidered work for my show, I was barely able to keep my head above water. A lovely coincidence would happen and then I found out my husband had Covid. Another amazing event would happen and then I found out the majority of my prints stored in the basement were ruined by foxing. I could go on and on. It was a really intense time.
Things have slowed down a bit lately in all departments, and I am more than OK with it. But I still like to ponder what it all means. These experiences give me the sense that everything is interconnected. If everything is ONE thing, then why wouldn't ONE conspire to bring about these moments of delight? It would be like leaving bread crumbs on a trail to oneself. Every crumb is pure joy and we are thrilled to have another clue. But then the mystery only deepens. What is all this and where am I heading? Of course, we don't really know. However, I am left with a feeling of reassurance. And I am also left with a strong urge to keep my eyes and ears open. I imagine using every sense I have to find another tidbit. I am ready to run when I catch the scent. I imagine myself a fearless gobbler of morsels ever-hungry for more.
But I suppose a more apt metaphor for this post would be that we are all sprouts transformed by sun, water, earth and moon. Hardships are endured. But with each drop of water and every ray of sun, we grow. We grow through storm, drought, exquisite moonlit nights, and spring rains... the smell of damp earth almost too lovely to bear. All come and go bearing gifts of transformation. Until one day we realize we are no longer a sprout but a great tree providing shade on a hot day. We realize we are the tree, the water, the sun and moon, the shade, the sky and all the spaces in-between.
“Margo always loved mysteries.
And in everything that came afterward,
I could never stop thinking
that maybe she loved mysteries so much
that she became one.”
—John Green, Paper Towns
—John Green, Paper Towns
The "Tathagatagarbha" print is now available at NessyPress.com.
ADDENDUM
Something happened the night I finished this post that is so weird it seriously blows my mind. I was looking up the source links for my Tathagatagarbha definitions and I saw this:
 |
| (Source) |
The reason why it caught my attention is that, as I briefly mentioned above, I have been dealing with "foxing" now for six months. It has been a huge presence in my life! I had a terrible discovery in February that many of my prints had been ruined by "foxing"! This was not a small thing that happened. I was devastated and have been working closely with a paper conservator to figure out how to treat my prints. I just treated another print this week. It is a labor intensive process and I will be dealing with foxing for some time.
So, as you might guess, when I see that word I pay attention. After I saw that reference, I Googled "Tathagatagarbha and foxing" and found this quote:
"Another Yogacara innovation is the concept of the tathagatagarbha, or the “womb of the Buddha,” also called Foxing (pronounced “fo-shing”) or “Buddha Nature,” by the Chinese."
(Source)
(Source)
And then I found this:
 |
| Source |
So apparently, foxing means "Buddha-nature!" OMG! My mind is officially blown! So weird.
And to add a cherry on top, last night I told George there was one more synchronicity that I wasn't including in the post because it was getting too long. When I was reading Robert Moss's book, Sidewalk Oracles, there was a chapter called "Fox Tales." It caught my attention because I had just discovered the "foxing" issue with my prints. I took this photo because, at the time, it gave me a sliver of solace when dealing with my new wily friend.
